In the midst of this heavy-hearted climate, I am feeling called to share a bit of my present-day healing journey and the importance of Pleasure as Medicine.
Years ago, I stepped away from activist circles and activity, because I realized through some painful intimate experiences, that I was hurting very deeply from the trauma I had experienced in this world. Even the well-meaning rhetoric about black oppression and how black women were at the “bottom of the barrel” in our society, felt limiting and hurtful. Internalizing these thoughts-this societal trauma-was affecting how I moved through every aspect of my life.
My body, mind and spirit was calling out for deep healing and redemption-especially in the sexual realm, where I was hurting the most. I began to focus on myself and pour into me. This began my exploration of sacred sexuality, meditation, and body-based mindfulness practices.
I am a black woman, and my life matters too.
It is therefore most important for me…for us…to LIVE. To experience the fullness of our own vitality.
I understand now, that I can change the world-through transforming my very presence and being a beacon of light.
I can change the world-simply by nurturing and cultivating this plant right here-by giving her the space, nutrients, and soil to live and breathe and be.
In attuning myself to my body and gaining greater awareness of who I am, I cultivate an inner-power that no one can take away from me. Especially for those of us who are most vulnerable to our physical or worldly freedoms being taken from us-I feel that this level of attunement is necessary for our liberation and can even protect us.
Many of us are feeling the heat and pressure from others on social media. Those of us who genuinely care, regardless of our race or nationality-want to do what we can to make a difference in this world.
Amidst all of that, I think there is often a sense of guilt and shame that one may carry for not taking action or speaking out in the most popular or prescribed ways, or for simply allowing one’s self to fully experience authentic pleasure and joy, when others are hurting.
Especially and particularly for black women, I want to encourage us to give ourselves permission to be. Our presence and our lives are revolutionary at this time-and we can amplify that through being even more present for our own bodies…for our own breath.
It is a magnificent step in the right direction-for us to embody what it is that we want to see for others. Find ways to cultivate joy and pleasure in your life-the kind of pleasure that you don’t have to chase, but which truly resonates afterwards, and fulfills you. It can be as simple as stopping to smell the flowers, or dancing in your living room, or taking a few extra minutes to massage your body in the shower, or planning a sensual evening for yourself. Laughter, Sensuality, and Play are medicine. Find ways to celebrate your life and body you’ve been gifted with for this life. You matter.
If we’re working towards wholeness in our world, we must first tend to ourselves. It begins with our intimate bodies, our emotional relationships with ourselves, and then we can expand that wholeness to our loved ones and society at large. There is enough space for all of us to live out our purpose-and everyone has their own unique gifts, skills, and voices to contribute.There is more than enough to go around for everyone.
Let me tell you something right now. We are at the pinnacle of a massive energetic shift going on in our world. Humanity is spiritually growing up. We are experiencing the growing pains, and the inevitable tragedies that had to shift us into our awakening. Nothing is a mistake. And from my perspective, not very much is new or surprising. But I do feel that there is something distinctly different about this time.
Let’s harness this energy for the greater good.